The Conspicuous Void: An Issue We Face When Making a Change

I've spent quite some time thinking about and writing about ways to improve my, your, or our life.  A few posts back, I wrote about taking an active approach to improving your life and followed that up by suggesting a few strategies to successful take those steps.

The other day, I was browsing YouTube and came across a channel I've watched a few times before.  Basically, it's this former body builder giving advice about various issues.  He ranges from body building tips to health tips to life tips and everything in between.  I really like his raw honesty--it's refreshing.  A video came up in the suggested videos section of YouTube and after watching it, I was inspired for this post.  I had already been thinking about this topic, but the video gave me the extra push I needed.

To give you a reference point, the guy's video was his response to a question from one of his subscribers.  The question was basically laid out as this: "I really want to be successful and am inspired by how you've found success, but I've been addicted to video games for ten years and it's destroying my life.  What do I do?"

Being addicted to video games so weird and juvenile, but it's a real issue for some people.  People have strange addictions and this addiction is no different from the next in the sense that it is controlling/ruining a life.  In short, the YouTuber said the best way to make a drastic life change is by either having a big goal or having tragedy strike.  Basically, he was saying you need something dramatic to happen if you want to break the chain because things like addictions aren't easily defeated.  He made a good point when he said having a big, ambitious goal can be good but the danger in lies with the fact that it is something you're running towards and not from.  If you see the end, you aren't always going to have the motivation to get there quicker because you know/presume you will get there.  Conversely, if you have something chasing you/biting you in the ass, you're going to start running.

He admitted the advice was extreme, but he suggested that the guy take his video game consoles and smash them.  Then, he said to suggested the guy get in his car and drive away.  He wanted him to doing something extreme so he could have a moment where he realized, "Crap, I really need to figure something out."  While it's a little extreme, it makes sense.

Maybe not everyone has an addiction, or at least an extreme addiction, but we all have our weaknesses.  Problematically, these weaknesses can really have an adverse affect on our lives.  Sometimes, we decide we want to make a change for the better.  For instance, if you spend way too much time on Facebook, you may decide that you're only going to check it twice a day for ten minutes instead of spending hours on social media.  Or, you could decide you're going to cut down on TV time or stop eating fast food.  There are limitless examples of things people could decide to stop doing.  Making this decision is great and ambitious.  Cutting down or stopping certain poisons in your life could really improve things.  Note: I don't think activities like playing video games, checking Facebook, eating fast food, etc are innately bad.  When they start taking over your life, it's a problem.  Moderation people.

The Real Issue

At this point, you may be wondering where I'm going with this, and I don't blame you.  So, I'll cut to the chase.  While it's auspicious to make decisions like the examples above, or to want to stop your addiction to video games like the subscriber, it isn't easy task.  No shit Sherlock. You can do it, surely, but what makes it really difficult is people don't always take into account the void.  That's the real kicker.  If someone is used to playing video games two hours a day, for instance, and they decide to only play for say thirty minutes they are left with an extra hour and a half.  I think the really struggle comes in figuring out how to fill that hour and a half.  You can say you'll use it to be more productive, but unless you have an idea in place you run the risk of not having anything to do, which could lead to boredom, which could lead to relapse.

I'll use myself as an example. There have been many times this summer when I've decided that I'm not going to go on social media and I'm going to avoid video games in order to be productive.  Then, the time comes and while I want to be productive, I'm unsure of what "being productive" means.  I didn't label it correctly.  Sure, I've spent the time job searching, but one can only do that for so long without going insane.  Then I could blog, but that only takes a bit of time.  So, at times I'm left pondering what I'm doing with my life.  It's a real struggle.  Then what happens? Facebook, Twitter, ESPN, etc.

Sometimes, you do need something dramatic to really kick your butt in to gear. Some people just won't find the motivation otherwise.  I think, though, many of us have to drive to make that positive change, but we just need a better strategy to do it.  There are many options out there, we just have to have the courage to pick one and go for it.  It's great to want to make a change, but usually a change involves going from one thing to another.  If you merely quit one thing, a conspicuous void will haunt you.  Think about it.  You're so used to doing one thing; it's nearly impossible to quit cold turkey without replacing it.  I think again it comes to mettle and moxie.  I really like that phrase because I think it fits with so many aspects of life--the ability to go for something while being able to adapt and cope.  Sometimes, you just need to make a leap.

Conclusion

When you decide that an aspect of your life is being detrimental to the overall productivity and happiness of your life, the gain of time is really providential.  It can be a burden, yes, but you're making a conscious decision to improve so why not take it a step further.  You've given yourself the opportunity to keep your house clean, learn how to cook, join a new club, learn a new trade, live a happier life.  We just have to find a way to figure out what we really want.  Some people know off the bat--they've been putting a dream or necessity off for too long and can fill that void.  Others need motivation.  Others need to dig deep and weigh the pros and cons with lists.  Everyone has there unique quirks that make them special.  I don't know what the answer is to finding the fill for the void; I just think we need to be more conscious of the precarious nature of that void.

I believe you and I can cut out or cut down some negative aspects of our lives.  We just might need to rethink about our approach and take it on with a greater force.  Life is too short and too precious to waste.  Don't you want to live the best life you can? Don't you want to find fulfillment and happiness?  I know I do; that's why I'm constantly trying to figure out ways to reach that goal.  Hopefully, together, we can reach that goal.